Workout progress/injuries

So far, since February, I've gotten from 210 to 185 - a total of 25 pounds gone. Good job me! 

The challenge now is keeping the momentum going, especially since:

• the last two months have actually seen only a 1-pound loss, which suggests that even despite my extensive time on the elliptical I'm having a hard time keeping the momentum going;

• my recent injury from a car accident, combined with the trainer's increasing intensity, have made it hard to get into the gym as often as I'd like.

So, now, apparently, I have to Mix Up my workouts. The suggestion from the trainer is Incline Walking and Running. Right now running just isn't going to work, since I'm still recovering from the headaches and hip stuff - but I managed 20 minutes of pretty intense Incline Walking at the gym on Sunday along with another 20 minutes on the elliptical, and it was definitely doable. Tomorrow, I go back for more Incline Walking/Elliptical training, and then next week I start running again. In the meantime, I also have to start fitting yoga in - fixing up the yoga room helped, but the motivation's been tough to get going.

Here's to reaching 180!

Running day 2: man, that hurt

Today's run started with 30 minutes on the elliptical (damn them for playing a James McAvoy movie at the gym) followed by another 23 minutes of 60-second walk/run intervals. First 10-15 minutes were fine; by minute 22 (the last run) my sides had started buckling up. 

Next time, I'll likely do 15 on the elliptical, or potentially start off with walking again (I'm scheduling another run for Sunday). Can't say I'm disappointed with my progress, but it does look like this running thing will take a while to get into fully, and I don't want to stall my weight loss by moving into an activity that I have to take slowly.

Meanwhile, I did some quick measurement comparison at the gym. 

Back in 9/07 (when I quit the gym for a while):

weight: 208

tricep: 13.5

chest: 42.5

waist: 38

abs: 42

hips: 43.75

thigh: 27.5

calf: 16.5

as of 7/25/08:

weight: 186 (-22lbs)

tricep: 13 (-.5 in)

chest: 40.5 (-2 in)

waist: 35 (-3 in)

abs: 39.5 (-2.5 in)

hips: 42 (-1.75 in)

thigh: 25.5 (-2 in)

calf: 16 (-.5 in)

It would be great if these numbers were a bit lower, but I'll take it. Also, this really is pretty impressive considering that technically, I've only been losing weight since February of this year, and I started at 210 in February.

The only thing I'm worried about now is plateauing - I want to keep the weight loss going. I'll figure it out somehow.

Today's workout/progress

Today: 15 minutes of elliptical followed by 30 minutes of strength training and 15 minutes of stretching.

Normally, I flank my strength workouts with 15-minute jaunts on the elliptical, but last night's run has my legs and hips a bit tighter than normal, and I started feeling gentle pulls on my thighs as I did the first part of my strength workouts (front, side and back squats with a 4-kg medicine ball), so I felt it was probably best to rest and stretch after the workout.

All in all, though, it felt good - and my mood is much better now than it has been in the last couple of days. This, of course, indicates that I should work out more often, which is Fine by Me.

In terms of progress, I also weighed myself this afternoon - and I'm down to 186, from 189 last week. This is mostly water weight, I'm imagining, but still - that means that 185 is around the corner, which in turn means I'll be down 25 pounds total since the beginning of the year. Not too shabby!

It's about time I got to the gym again!

So, last week was a bit of a bust gym-wise. It was emotionally draining on a number of fronts (which I won't elaborate on), and frankly, I was just too TIRED - to the point where, when I visited my trainer on Tuesday, it knocked me out for the rest of the evening.

However, today I was back in the gym, and I did a full 30 minutes of upper-body work and crunches before doing about 40 minutes on the elliptical. Tomorrow, I have a trainer's appointment at 9am, which I will follow with another 30-40 minutes on the elliptical.

On the eating thing, I'm still working out a system - being so close to the move means no "real" cooking for me, so I got a bunch of prepared stuff at Whole Foods that I'm sustaining myself with for the week. First order of business once I'm in the new place: organize the Kitchen and the Office. Highest Priority.

For now, though, I read Harry Potter.

Morning Notices

It is a profound testiment to the effectiveness of my almost-daily workouts that, after two days of relative laziness and rampant overeating (hamburgers - I ate HAMBURGERS! AND pizza! What is it about 's house that brings about this profound laziness within me? ah well), my weight hasn't increased. It hasn't really DECREASED either, but I wasn't really expecting it to - it's been a week since I last weighed myself, and I've been adding some serious strength training to my workouts.

What I have noticed, though, is that the mound of flab that has been my stomach over the past several months has been calming down and moving on from me, and my clothes are fitting a bit better (although there's still some work to be done in this regard). Also, there's this glow of contentment and a smile that hasn't really been able to leave my face since starting the workouts, and this pleases me greatly. Plus - I'll say it - I look HOT while I'm working out. At least I did today. Not so much in the yoga classes, but I'm not worried about that. I'll still go, and I'll probably start adding more restorative and hip-opening/shoulder-opening stuff at home as the weeks pass.

I decided to splurge on 10 1/2-hour personal training sessions as a gift to myself. This is probably the last such gift for a while, as I want to start actually SAVING some money, and lately I've been far to spendy. But I don't judge.

Another quick notice: it's GORGEOUS lately. Today's walk to the gym was a delight - still some moisture on the ground, and it hadn't gotten over-hot yet. Today's shower will be good.

Well, I'm fat.

So the verdict is in - I'm fat. Although I have to say that I guessed pretty well about my current status - I've lost some weight in the last week or two, and the scale told me just about what I expected to hear. And don't worry - I'm not stressed out/angry about it. Honestly, I'm not even really worried about it - because I know it's going to change.

So, to the stats:
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 205 lbs

Body Mass Index: 30.3 (JUST over the obese line)
Body Fat Percentage: 34.9%

Measurements (I'm remembering most of these from the top of my head, so they might be off a bit)
Waist: 43 in
Bust: 44 in
Underbust: 37 in
Hip: I want to say 42?
Thigh: 27.5
Calf: I think 16.5?
Tricep: I think 13.5.

I'll have to double-check the numbers when I get back to the gym today for yoga (didn't get a workout today; just the preliminary stuff), but that's about what she wrote.

What's fascinating about this experience was how calm and - frankly - not upset I was when I heard the numbers. Sure, they're higher than I like, and I still get a twinge of "what the hell" when I look in a mirror (especially when I'm working out), but right now, I just know that it's a starting point, and that all of these numbers are going to change.

So, that said, the goals are:
a) get down to a comfortable size 8;
b) have more energy and focus throughout the day (which is something I'm already achieving)
c) stop getting winded when I reach the top of the stairs in the gym (i.e. three flights of stairs)
d) strengthen my core so that I can do more powerful yoga practices.

I'll re-check all the numbers once a month, and check in with myself periodically to see how I'm feeling, how things are fitting, etc... and every time I lose a size (or achieve a pose I haven't been able to before), I'll celebrate. With what, I haven't determined yet.

I have to admit - this is pretty exciting!

okay, yes, well - it HAS been a long time!

So, it's been a while since I've updated all the occasional readers out there as to the stuff going on in this area of my life, and I thought I'd break the habit of ignoring this humble blog, especially since now things are actually happening.

This month has been amazing on multiple fronts. For one thing, I have been getting tons of work lately, which has been exhilerating but a bit scary. Through my talks with la lovely therapist and with my amazing lifestyle/business collaborator, Brenda Stanton, I looked within and realized, through waves of concern and panic over whether I can actually be productive with all this work on my plate, that all of the various times that I've been truly productive and happy in my life, I've worked out every day.

So, I made a promise to myself. If one of my new clients came through (one that came in quite randomly about a week and a half ago, and thus was thoroughly extra income), I would join Healthworks in Cambridge and start working out every day.

And, I got the client. So now I'm a Healthworks member. It's been a week and a half, but I've exercised more in the last week and a half than I was able to do in the last month. So far, the changes have been amazing already - although I haven't gotten the eating thing completely handled yet, I've definitely been eating better than I was before, I've been sleeping better, relaxing, and amazingly productive. And - this is important - I CAN BREATHE AGAIN! Whenever I get to a certain weight (and I've been at this weight for over a year) I have horrible breathing problems, especially when I'm exerting myself. But today, I was able to get all the way up three flights of stairs without getting TOO winded - still a bit, but hey. It's progress.

I'll probably post more as the week unfolds, but thought I'd share this for the moment.

Spring is here!

Okay, so yeah - I haven't been posting here for a while. But things have been going terrifically well - I think spring fever has finally gotten to me, and I've been clearing out all sorts of junk, both emotionally and physically. Not only was I finally able to get rid of some old-relationship baggage I'd been carrying around with me for years, I was able to finish the zen kitchen's website after six months of stalling, I rearranged my office to be LITERALLY 100% more productive (I actually have a reading/sketching/laptop using nook now!), and I've been able to start tearing through the pile of magazines and books that have been staring me in the face for months.

The further upside of all this lovely productivity is that the weather has been wonderful, so I've been forcing myself to get out and enjoy it for at least an hour per day, and that has not only improved my mood, but I've been seeing increased smallness as well!

Okay, so now I have to head out for brunch with my boyfriend, but thanks for letting me fill you all in on this recent goodness!

Getting clearer

This week has been... interesting. Challenging, but interesting.

I realized after a day of being completely useless and, frankly, miserable that, as much as I'd sometimes really like to, I just can't do the after-midnight bedtimes anymore. I wake up too late and feel like a wreck the next day. Part of the late bedtime was due to my own procrastination, as well as my insistance on taking on more during the day than is physically possible (because yeah, I'm Superwoman like that). On Monday, I stayed up until about 2am working on a strategic vision and marketing plan for the zen kitchen, which is a surprisingly exhausting and somewhat scary activity. I'm actually starting to think like a CEO, and being someone who hated corporate in all its incarnations, this is a very new thing for me. So I'm working through it.

Meanwhile, there have been a LOT of positives this week. I seem to be getting smaller again (although I'm not completely sure how), I was able to complete the marketing plan and create a manageable system to market myself each week/month (with actual milestones to track progress), and I'm about halfway done with the tzk mission statement; now I just have to figure out what makes me unique in the marketplace, and start seriously looking at who my competitors are and how I can distinguish myself from them. In the meantime, I have a few new projects trickling in, and a lot of people asking about my services - which is just LOVELY.

That's all to report for now.

I Am Woman, Hear Me Roar! (quietly, yes, but still)

This morning I finally took myself up on my commitment to go to o2 Yoga on Tuesday mornings, and even after three days of no yoga and WAY more meat than I should ever be eating, I have to say I'm a lot stronger than I think I am. I was able to get through a pretty vinyasa-heavy class (for the non-yoga folks out there, it's this sequence of postures where you touch your toes, jump back to a push-up position, do a push up, arch your back up and then bring your butt up so your body's in an upside-down V shape. This happens about every 5 minutes as you do the practice.) without killing myself, although I was doing it A LOT more slowly towards the end. Still, it was definitely Good For Me.

What I like about going to class as opposed to my normal home practice (especially when the class is at o2) is that it's inspiring - most of the students at o2 are people, like me, who do yoga as their primary spiritual/physical practice, and all of them have really beautiful bodies - a body which, despite having quite a bit of extra padding still, I'm starting to see in myself.

I have so much more to write about in terms of various life-changing moments, but I have to go be productive now. I'm so pleased!

Changes

One of the things you notice when you've been working out a lot (at least I notice it) is that your whole body starts to change; the fat is still there to an extent, but everything is tighter, more athletic. I've been doing yoga on a pretty regular basis now for about a month now, and I'm starting to notice a huge difference in my overall shape, especially my stomach. I've still got plenty to pinch, mind, but I swear I can see a six-pack under the flab that has yet to go away. on top of that, my arms are much less jiggly.

It's nice to take notice of things like that once in a while. It gets too easy to focus on the numbers on the scale and refuse to notice the small victories that life is handing you.

Winter weather blahs and blechs

I have to admit, it gets much harder to stick to my daily yoga plan during the winter. I tend to get a touch of SAD, which makes getting out of bed more difficult than I care for it to be (this morning, which is gray and rainy, was nearly impossible), but I'm somehow managing to persevere. The last few days my practice has been limited or non-existent, but I'm going to take some time to do it now before I get into the full swing of the workday.

In other news, I was finally able to get a new (and quite lovely) yoga outfit for myself, as a reward for being so good on vacation. I'm starting to notice now that I don't have as many bulges as I used to have; while I'm certainly not skinny, there's a much leaner overall appearance to my body that I'm quite enjoying.

Not much to report

Except to say that I'm seeing definite tightening of certain areas (especially my tummy, arms and bum), I'm eating more mindfully, and there is a definite Loosening of Pant. All of which makes me very happy.

Now that I'm back in the grind, so to speak, daily yoga is a bit more of a challenge than it was during vacation. There was less of an excuse then—I didn't have jobs to get to, or things to do, and I could allow myself not to have a choice to do it. Now that I'm here, I'm finding all sorts of little excuses not to do it.

My next big challenge is taking control of my time. This means less time checking e-mail and my various online distractions, and more time making lists and getting through them. The New Year has brought with it a few new clients already, so it's time to get on top of things!

Edit: Upon further inspection, I'm also noticing significantly Less to Pinch, another thing that makes me smile.

It fits ALL. Really?

Taken from a yoga store's website:

"This tank is available in a single, one-size-fits-all size. It will comfortably fit anyone from size 2 through 8."

I ask you, REALLY. Is that one size fits ALL?

Let me start (well, okay—continue) this rant by stating one thing unequivocally: I ain't petite. I never WAS petite. I shall never BE petite. At my absolute thinnest EVER I was a size 10, and while some probably thought I could have lost even a bit more weight, I didn't need to, and I certainly didn't want to. I, and my body, were perfectly happy at a size 10. I looked good. I was healthy. I was happy. As. A. Size. 10.

Now. You wanna rephrase that one-size-fits-all bit?

After two weeks of daily yoga

I'm noticing that I don't eat nearly as much as I used to (although yesterday, exhausted from the lack of sleep that accompanied New Year's Eve at my mom's house, was a definite Off Day). I'm also noticing that I generally have more energy, despite the fact that I desperately need to crash hard and early tonight. But most of all, I'm noticing not only that I'm stronger, but that the uncomfortable tightness that accompanied certain items of clothing just recently has lessened significantly, even though it's still on the tight side.

What I'm saying here is that I'm pretty damn psyched and I want to keep this up.

I'm also saying that I managed to meet my goal of doing yoga every day during my vacation (with the exception of the day I spent walking to the store and cleaning the layer of white dust from renovations that was covering my apartment when I got home, which broke me for a day), which means I get to give myself a reward. So sometime this week I'm going to get myself a snazzy new yoga outfit, probably from Lulu Lemon, but I'm open to suggestion.

Vacation Day 3: Progress Made, but Slowly

So, I'm on day three of the big Florida trip, and thus far I've done yoga every day and evening, and I even got in a 1-hour private class with my boyfriend Nick's mother (who it turns out is a quite accomplished yogini herself) along with my two daily practices. The eating is still not quite where it should be (I'm feeling insanely bloated today from all the food I've been eating and the overwhelming lack of fiber), but I'm practicing compassion and forgiveness towards myself for it, and working towards enforcing smaller portions with myself, which proves challenging with Nick's family; his father loves to cook as much as I do, and every time he does there's a metric ton of really tasty food to contend with. If I can just get him not to do appetizers all the time in addition to three courses, I'd be okay.

Overall, though, I'm pleased. I'm a bit behind the ball on yoga today (I couldn't get to sleep last night, so I'm off-kilter today), but I'm going to do it now. Ta!

Mindful eating over the holidays: a childish dream?

My goodness, it's hard to stay focused on eating well over the holidays! This weekend was especially tough; I went to a lovely party hosted by a couple of friends where I was treated to a seemingly neverending buffet of hot chocolate, pound cake and 2 trays of chocolate chip cookies straight out of the oven (let me tell you—if there ever was a weakness, it is that). Today between waking up late from the late night at my friend's party to running down to Providence to spend time with family before I leave for my Florida vacation, I ended up eating a whole pile of stuff I wouldn't consider eating otherwise, including McDonald's and TasteeCakes (WHY did I pick those up?) Overall, it's been a challenge the last couple of weeks.

So it's time to step up a bit with my original fitness plan. A while back, I had made a deal with myself; if I exercised every day (by exercise, I mean 45 minutes of physical activity a day, which can be training on the elliptical, vinyasa yoga, pilates or walking) every week, on Sunday night I would give myself $5 in a special fund which would be used to purchase some luxury item or another. It was originally going to be DVDs, but I'm beginning to think I'm going to start investing in some really nice yoga clothes—stuff I'd feel proud wearing if I have to run out and get something at the store before I do yoga. So this week, if I'm really good and I work out every day, I'm going to give myself $20. Week after, $15, week after that, $10 and back down to the original $5 per week. Hopefully in time I'll get back up to my goal again, and hopefully once I'm back in the swing of daily yoga, I can cut this sweet habit I've been going insane with.

Thanksgiving: A Challenging Week

So, by the Monday before Thanksgiving, I was completely burned out on work. One project in particular had gotten me to the point where I didn't want to think about being near a computer, let alone getting more work done for my clients or for the zen kitchen. The good thing was that that Wednesday afternoon, we headed up to my mother's house in Maine, to spend four days hanging out with Mom, my best friend Rachael and her kids, our friend Sin and my boyfriend Nick. I had four days with NO INTERNET ACCESS WHATSOEVER. And it was beautiful.

It was, however, a bit challenging on the diet and exercise front. I actually ate some of my mother's turkey (oh my GOD it was good), and everyone at the house spent the entire time chipping away at the ungodly amount of food that was presented to us - sweet potatoes with marshmallows, walnuts and coconut, a 20-lb. turkey with stuffing, escarole soup (which I made with the turkey stock I made from the turkey bones) and some of mom's famous applesauce and cranberry sauce. I don't think there was a moment in four days when I actually felt hungry. To make matters worse, there was no room anywhere in the house where I could exercise, which meant no yoga, and no exercise other than a bit of a hike with the kids and Nick on Friday.

Since I got back on Sunday night, my eating has returned to almost normal, thank goodness - aside from a bit of ice cream here and there, I've been doing well. But I haven't been able to get back into the yoga habit, or do any other form of exercise with any consistency.

It's interesting to note how such a little setback can throw everything off course.

Day One: Back to Size 16

My name is Dani Nordin, and I turned 30 last July. I was born and raised in Providence, RI, and now live in Somerville, MA, where I moved almost two years ago. In my life, I've been an actress, a performance poet, a karaoke diva, an administrative assistant with a special gift for Access databases, a social and environmental activist, and a graphic designer. At the moment, I am the principal of a small but growing design studio called the zen kitchen, where I help businesses, individuals and non-profits expand their reach through eco-friendly graphic design and standards-based web design (two of my passions). I do yoga almost every day, have just started learning Tai Chi, and am an expert at making healthy vegetarian food taste so good you forget that it's good for you.

By many people's standards, I have a pretty good life. By my own standards, most of the time, I have a pretty good life. But one thing has bothered me since I was eight years old, and it's about time I came out about it: my weight.

Food, aside from being one of my passions, has always been the way I deal with stress. It's one of my few truly self-destructive tendencies; I get stressed out, all of a sudden I'm grabbing a bag of Cheetos at the grocery store and eating half of it on my way home, or stopping at some fast-food joint or another and deciding it's "okay this one time" if I have an entire order of Nachos Bell Grande (no meat, thank you very much). While normally I eat pretty healthy (other than a few particularly indulgent dishes I throw into the mix once a month or so), an extended period of stress is guaranteed to throw any health-conscious tendencies out the window.

I started using food as an outlet when I was about eight. My parents, never a particularly happy couple, were just starting to near the point of divorce, and for the life of me I didn't know how to deal with it. To make matters worse, I was—shall we say—unpopular as a child, branded "the smart kid" by the time I was in kindergarten, and torn between my desire to constantly be learning and my desire for people to stop making fun of me. I pretended I was okay. I withdrew to the library. I invented new snacks.

By the time I was fifteen, I was a size 18, and somewhere around 215 pounds. That year, about 2 years after my parents finally got divorced and 1 year after I had decided to stay with my father, something in me snapped. I moved in with my mother, gave up meat, and spent the next six months exercising every day and living on beans and rice, omelettes and pasta with tomato sauce (it was what we could afford, and it was what I liked to eat). By the time I returned to school, I had lost 65 pounds and decided to switch high schools so I could pursue my dream of acting. By the time I reached college, I was a size 10, and stayed vegetarian for the next three years.

Since that time, I've had two separate instances where, due to the circumstances of my life, I've found myself back around 215, made major life changes, and gotten back down to somewhere around 170. Right now, after 3+ years of dealing with one seemingly insane life-crisis situation after another, I've found myself back at a size 16, as a recent trip to Target has shown. And now, at 30, I feel like it's time to get this thing under control. It's time to change my relationship with food; to stop seeing it as comfort, or punishment for not doing/being what I should. It's time to get myself healthy again.

Over the next few months, I'll be using this blog to share my journey, not only as someone trying to lose weight, but as someone trying to find wellness in all areas of life—finances, stress, time management, relationship. You might ask why I'd share such incredibly personal information with an Internet full of complete strangers, especially as a business owner; the answer is simple. I know I'm not the only person out there who's ever experienced depression, and I certainly know I'm not the only woman who's ever suffered from a negative self-image as a result of her weight. And if my story can help even one person out there who's dealing with these issues, then I have fulfilled the purpose of this blog.